Annalee | Healing

I grew up in a Christian family and my mom and dad and my sister would go to church. It was just a normal family dynamic. 

I would say around 7th or 8th grade was when it got kind of hard, it got rocky. My parents split and it was a really hard transition for me and my sisters because it was kind of quick and we weren't expecting it.

From there it was a long off and on custody battle. From my mom's side to my dad's, I was kind of playing the part, playing each side so I could get what I wanted. I told the judge I wanted to live with my dad just because I was not getting what I wanted at my mom's. 

From there my dad found his wife off of an online dating website - she is now my stepmother - and she brought in her two kids.

It was, I think, in my 9th grade year and I had experienced sexual abuse within the family. It was pretty hard for me to deal with because I was told to keep quiet about it. I felt like I couldn't reach out to anybody and no one understood what I was going through. 

This turned into self harm. I would cut my arms just very aggressively, very angrily. I was very angry and I just wanted the pain to be directed at something else versus internally. Quickly enough I started having suicidal thoughts. 

I tried to commit suicide 3 different times and all three different times it didn't go through. In those moments, I didn't know why they weren't working. It was honestly frustrating and made me angry, but looking back at it now… I truly see God's grace and His mercy telling me that He is calling me to do something else and that He needs me to fulfill what He had promised me. 

I truly believe that the reason those attempts didn’t go through was because He said I have something bigger for you

Annalee has found forgiveness, established a healthy family of her own, and devoted her life to Jesus.